baggage's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm Mad! Mad I Tell You! Last night is creeping up on me and hanging on my eyelids. And even the miracle of caffeine disguised as a medium white chocolate mocha coffee is powerless against five sweet hours of sleep. A misty rain enveloped Riverside around 2 a.m. last night. I was walking down that familiar brick alley carrying my gear back to my truck when I realized (yet again) just how much playing is tattooed on my heart. Although my feet eyes and throat were tired from the gig, all I could think about was our performance (pretty good-not great), the feedback from my monitor (not cool at all), and the angelic sustain I was able to coax out of my strat during the last song (way, way, way cool). Even as my body touched down onto my bed, my mind was mentally working through all the adjustments I would make before the next gig. More high end here, less volume there, more chorus here... And the adjustments are perpetual. My tone will never be right. The monitor will always be too bright. Or too dark. The delay will always be too long. Or too short. And my high E will always be a little flat-or sharp-after every lead break. In my mind, the music can always get better. The music deserves to be better. I deserve to be better. It's a slight form of madness-this addiction that drives me to walk amidst a misty rain through an alleyway at 2 a.m.-not wondering when the hell I'll make it home, and not wondering how I'll feel when the alarm yells at me after five short hours of sleep. It's slightly mad because, instead, all I can do is look forward to the next time I get to do it all over again. I can't wait. 23:25:32 - 2001-03-16 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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