baggage's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Just Say No To Mental Yardsticks I carry a list with me at all times. It's the silliest of yardsticks -a mental *to do* list that I use to measure how productive I've been with my daily allotment of sunlight. This list is perpetually updated with things like *sweep up dust bunny next to speaker* and *pull up weed crowding corner sprinkler.* I check this list every morning-and I sometimes race against myself to see how many things I can cross off in the course of one day. This, my friends, is silly willy. Girl-Unit has repeatedly informed me that I'm clueless when it comes to relaxing. Give me a 1-4-5 progression and I'll whip out a huge collection of decent-sounding blues licks. Give me a building, and I'll draw a cutaway illustration that will look at home in any architectural manual. But give me a day of nothing to do and I start shaking-sweating even-at the thought of all those things piling up against my mental yardstick-the lawn? It's too shaggy! The floor? It's too dusty! The sink? It's too dirty! Quick! Grab the lawnmower, the broom, the Ajax and let's get moving! Which is why this past weekend was monumental in so many simple ways. As I said before, my good buddy J is leaving. This little bit of bittersweet has left me proud, sad and anxious. We've made a deal to spend his remaining weekends in Southern California together-playing guitar, talking, recording songs, going out for coffee-anything as long as it's together. And, as you may be able to guess, this deal means that my mental yardstick needs a bit of adjustment. The lawn has to wait, the sink can be bleach-brightened some other day-and the dustbunnies-those damn perpetual occupants of my hardwood floor-will maintain their rule over the kingdom underneath the soles of my shoes for the next few weeks. In their place are long conversations, bad jokes, cups of coffee, long walks, and lots of music. I have a friend that's leaving soon-and since God only knows when I'll see him again, I have put aside my anal-retentiveness about my house and the chores that accompany it in favor of his company. And so far, it's been worth it. 4:56 p.m. - 2001-06-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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