baggage's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Make This Moment a Little Bit Longer With my lungs still clinging to last night and a picture-worthy Sunday ahead, I sit down to indulge in a little narcissism. Real player serenades me with Misty, the shower runs in the background, and the clock on the screen tells me I'm living twenty minutes ahead of everyone else. This is my custom-created handicap: Clocks set 20 minutes fast so I can catch up with a world speeding by me in a sustained blur that intensifies with each smoky breath. But today is another matter. Today, I shed the rat costume and leave the cheese to someone else. My mind is surrounded by Brautigan's cactus fog and is not ready, willing nor able to tackle anything based on such matters. No. This will be an official day of memorization-a day where I etch each moment into the marrow of my life. When I'm 35, 40, 45, 60-when I'm on my back at the end of my own life-I want to stare at the wrinkles on her face, remember the inflections in her voice, feel the touch of her hand in mine. Moments that I will experience today. Moments that I've taken for granted for the past 34 years. There is little time to write. There is little time to worry about misplaced commas. There is little time for this. There is little time. And I have so much etching to do. 10:15 a.m. - 2002-10-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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